Coach

What is IFS?

Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a way of working with the inner world that is both structured and deeply humane. It starts from a simple observation: inside each of us there are different inner movements — impulses, fears, demands, desires — that take the lead at different moments. We call these inner movements parts.

At the same time, there is also a more spacious place from which we can relate to all of this with clarity and steadiness. In IFS, this is called Self: not something to achieve or perform, but a natural capacity for presence, curiosity, and grounded attention.

When inner reactions take over — anxiety, harsh self-criticism, tension, avoidance — access to that steadiness narrows. Artists often experience this as feeling overwhelmed, pulled in different directions, or at war with themselves, spending a great deal of energy trying to keep these reactions in check.

IFS works differently. Instead of trying to fix or silence these inner reactions, we learn to listen to them and understand what they are trying to protect. As our relationship to them changes, the system reorganises itself: effort softens, clarity increases, and parts that were once in conflict can begin to collaborate.

This shift is not abstract. It shows up in the body, in attention, and in the way creative work is lived — with more ease, more enjoyment, and less inner struggle.

A personal story

For years, I struggled with physical tension and stage fright.
I practised slowly and attentively, yet whenever the stakes were high, the same pattern returned: tightness, shallow breathing, shaking hands, a sound that collapsed under pressure.

What changed this was not more technique.
Through IFS, I began to relate differently to the inner reactions behind those moments. Instead of fighting them, I learned to listen to what they needed in order to soften.

As that relationship shifted, my body reorganised itself. My breath deepened, tension eased, and my sound opened and steadied. Playing under pressure slowly started to feel possible again — not as a trick or strategy, but as a change in how my system understood safety.

A common inner dynamic: performance anxiety

Performance anxiety rarely comes from a single place. Usually, it arises from the interaction between at least two inner movements that appear under pressure.

One of them is a frightened part.
It shows up in the body: a fast heartbeat, shaking, shallow breath, loss of steadiness or presence. These reactions tend to come automatically, without much choice, and can feel disproportionate to the situation at hand.

Alongside it, there is often another part — the one that cannot stand the fear.
This part wants things to go well. It prepares thoroughly, monitors details, searches for strategies or explanations, and becomes deeply frustrated when fear keeps interfering with what you know you can do.

Many approaches to stage fright try to help from within this second position: strengthening control, adding techniques, managing symptoms. While well intentioned, this often reinforces an inner struggle — one part trying to overpower another.

With this work, we take a different route.
Instead of asking the frightened part to calm down, we help the controlling part step back. This creates space for a different quality of attention, one that can meet fear with curiosity rather than urgency.

When that happens, something shifts.
The frightened part no longer needs to escalate to be heard, and the part that wants things to go well can support without pressure. What emerges is a system that works together — with less internal conflict and more available energy for performing as your best self.

PS. A note of hope

Creative work holds immense beauty, but it is often burdened by beliefs that cause real suffering.
When everyone around us — mentors, colleagues, friends — struggles with similar anxieties, exhaustion, or perfectionism, that suffering can seem inevitable. Even necessary.

I do not believe this to be true. Creating from joy, peace, and safety is not only possible; it is our birthright. And the world needs us to bring that aliveness through our art.

If you are curious about working in this way, you are welcome to book an introductory session.

What you can work on here

• chronic stress
• bodily tension
• creative blocks
• stage fright
• anxiety
• self-defeating perfectionism
• difficulty accessing flow
• low self-esteem
• harsh inner criticism
• self-doubt
• procrastination

Free introductory session

One hour, online.

Prices

Standard: 55€/hour

Sliding scale: reach out if you cannot afford this price. We will find a sustainable agreement.

Background & training

• Internal Family Systems Level 1 training, with Pilar de la Torre
• Programme Assistant at IFS Level 1 training, with Pilar de la Torre
• The Essential PAUSE for Self-Leadership, with Joanna Curry-Sartori
• Translation of Healing the Healer workshop by Tom Holmes, for the Spanish IFS Institute
• Free Up & Play, workshop in Nonviolent Communication applied to stage fright, with Mieke Wouters
• Individual work in the Alexander Technique, with Anne Smith
• Member of the Association for Coaching

Continuing formation

• IFS Level 2 training, IFIO (Intimacy From the Inside Out), with Janet McCurdy & Joya Lonsdale. September-October 2026
• Translation of IFS Level 3 training, with Ann Sinko. October 2026